The day before yesterday, on an outing with Judith, I met Robin and Shirin on the way home. Other than exchanging general pleasantries, part of my conversation with Robin went something like this:

Robin: Xuwen! You're wearing PINK!

Me: Yes, I know. (The general undertone of that comment being--er, so?)

Robin: It's such a...girly colour!

Me: But I'm a girl what. I have a right to wear a girly colour.

Robin (with an expression of honest appallment, if there's such a word): But, you're not a girl. You're Xuwen!

Judith (cutting in helpfully): Give her a chance lah. See? She has pierced ears and rebonded hair. (Proceeds to wave my ponytail to prove her point.)

Due to my natural slow reaction, it didn't occur to me until sometime later what an incredible INSULT I had just been delivered. It was truly unfortunate that my brain cells didn't process that fast enough. I should have hit them both over the head with the nice, girly sling bag that I had stolen from my sister.

For some reason, Judith and I are a fatal combination. I don't mean that in the sense that we are very powerful together, more that our mutual company seems to increase our propensity of screwing up things that we all take for granted in our daily lives.

Other than our dramatic rush to watch what turned out to be a dress rehearsal at CHS, our countless miscommunications on where to meet, Judith leading me utterly in the wrong direction to go to specific locations that she swears she knows very well, me telling her the wrong bus to take to her house, us taking the wrong bus together to go somewhere quite unintended (and of course continually blaming each other for it), we had yet another incident on Saturday.

We were eating together at Sushi Tei when we decided to watch Howl's moving castle. After several phone calls we found that it was showing at five at west mall and five thirty five at cineleisure. Because of hideous orchard road traffic, especially in the evenings, the two hour plus of excess time we had, we decided to go to west mall to watch it.

So we went to take the MRT, changed the train at city hall and proceeded to chat happily for the next half an hour or so. Then at a lull in the crowd and the noise, I heard clearly as the train was slowing down, "Kembangan". This is what you generally term as an Oh Shit point in time. Anyway, we got off at Bedok and took the train back to somerset, where we made it on time but missed the movie because the tickets were sold out.

Anyway today I finally bought the beanbag for Hannah that I had been hunting for ages, from a beanbag shop on the basement of park mall. I felt rather stupid lugging it around later, though thankfully I had very helpful people around me to like, hold one end of the bag so I wouldn't look so stupid. With Wenjun and Felda's kind assistance, I made it to ACJC were the security gave a slanted look at the huge thing and asked what it was. Then thankfully in ACJC Suzie carried it aroun for me, so I didn't have to answer a hundred and one stupid questions revolving around: Hey! What on EARTH is that?

I ate a hell lot today too. Other than fish and co with Wenjun (feeling slightly guilty cos she was just looking), when we went to Hannah's house Grace and I proceeded to raid her fridge, which has a low turnover rate and requires nice greedy people like us to, you know, keep things fresh. By getting rid of old consumables and suchlike. That was in addition to the rather oily but not too bad packet of noodles that Hannah got for me. Then we sat around her jigsaw puzzle for a while, where I pretty much shifted pieces around because I was bad at finding any that fitted. As a result I forgot that Desperate Housewives was showing and came home too late to watch it. ARGH.

So many random thoughts today. i was just reading about the suicides recently, and it occured to me that every time this happens, people always say, "oh, but he/she should have shared it with us! Any problem could have been dealt with!" And we frequently forget that many a time people DO, just that we're so caught up in our own lives that we make excuses not to "involve ourselves too much". The man who killed himself out of debt did try to borrow money first.

Yet in saying this I am also a little of a hypocrite, because I realise that I look down on people that disregard their own existence. I was watching a Korean drama the other day and the main character got leukemia, and had three to six months to live without a bone marrow transplant. And I wondered, if I had been in that position, what would I have done? ANd the answer was instinctive. Round up all my relatives and friends, dig out all my savings and pour all these resources into making rounds to find a match. If i can't, at least there would be more samples in the blood bank. It was also then that I realised that I rather spend my remaining time fighting for a chance to live on longer, than getting precious company and putting my affairs in order. (but of course, I consider the age. The Korean woman was only twenty plus so I was thinking along these lines. If I was ninety I don't think I would have bothered)Perhaps precisely because I am unsure of the concept of eternal life, I love my existence so.